Never call your date if you are upset: A lot of the times a woman will call a man after the date and be really upset with him for not calling. This puts a freeze on the development on the relationship especially if the guy doesn’t get why she’s so angry since the date went well. Try not to analyze why he hasn’t contacted you yet. Perhaps he had a busy week and is planning on calling you when the time is right. If your feeling resentful you can relieve this frustration in other ways, such as working out or journaling.
Leave the questions out: Unless a man is entering the commitment stage of dating, generally he doesn’t like to talk about the relationship. Men like to live in the moment and see where things go. Let the dates continue to develop and enjoy the process.
Example of questions not to ask:
“Do you want to spend more time with me?”
“Did you have a good time?”
“How much time do you have available for a relationship?”
All of these questions could give the impression that your vulnerable and a bit desperate to be in a relationship. Continue to go on more dates and if you feel like these questions are still burning in the back of your mind then perhaps he is not the one.
Make positive comments: The secret of calling a man is to make positive comments. Tell him how you felt about the date and what you enjoyed. To help achieve this you can use for your information only statements, eg. “I really loved the movie, especially the scene where…
“The food was excellent. Jacob’s has fantastic steaks”
Always keep in mind that the way to a man’s heart is through complimenting and appreciating the things he provided.
Talk about what happened not about him: Talking about what happened on your date goes directly to his heart. It opens the discussion when you can both relate to the dinner experience, movie etc. It’s a little too early in the dating process to tell your date how much you enjoyed spending time with him. He may feel a sense of obligation or pressure to take you out again. You want to keep it simple, and allow him to experience those feelings of wanting to see you again. If you focus on sharing positive feelings about the date, he will think you are fun to do things with and will be counting down the days to do it all over again.
Don’t give advice on anything but instead ask for advice: Men need to feel that they can offer a woman some expertise. If you have a situation at work and need some advice, then by all means ask away. Whenever a man gets to feel useful to a woman, he will feel more proud of himself and like her more. As women, we sometimes feel that we have all the answers, so its nice to get a male perspective on life.
Don’t offer to help him in any way, but instead ask for his help-If a man wants help he will often ask for it, if your offering help too early it may appear that you are too eager to win his affections. Men are very picky about receiving help because they really like proving that they can do things alone. Instead, ask for his help in putting together new furniture, or changing the lights. Whatever it may be, asking a man for help will definitely make him feel useful and proud of his accomplishments.
So the next time you fear calling a man after the date, you can refer back to these guidelines and practice putting them into action. It is important to remember that dating is a process, so remove all expectations and let it happen naturally.
