I’ve been thinking a lot about friendships/relationships, that have came into my life and exited over this past year. Sometimes they come to an end as the natural circle of life. We are in constant change, evolving and growing and we say goodbye to friendships/relationships that no longer serve us.
The holidays can be a painful time of year for many who have suffered a breakup, lost their job, or been through any other difficult situations.
How we frame these events is so important for letting go and moving forward.
For me, now when a relationship dissolves it isn’t always a devastating loss. It can be a learning experience as I reflect back and feel fortunate that this person was in my life. For example, if I didn’t have the emotional support five years ago, to take the leap and quit my job working in a Boutique hotel to do Matchmaking full time I may have never made the change. Although that breakup was extremely painful at the time, it brought some light at the end. He was my REASON.
A dear friend shared this quote with me, when he knew I was going through this difficult time “People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.”
This was exactly what I needed to hear and to this day, I’m able to put friends, acquaintances, and ex-boyfriends into one of these three categories.
“When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.”
“When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.”
“LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to except the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships in areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.”
Unfortunately, we don’t always get to dictate which of our relationships are a season, a reason or a lifetime. However, we can manage our own selves, our energy, our authenticity, our conscious awareness, and how we process any pain and difficulty in our life.
I hope this beautiful poem will bring some closure for you as you pause and reflect and find a little more light and peace for yourself.